General jokes

There are 1054 funny General jokes in this category.

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The Lettuce Joke (Added On: 2010-03-11 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

What did the salad say when the cabbage interrupted their meal? Lettuce alone!

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New Boots (Added On: 2010-03-11 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

An elderly couple is vacationing in the West.

Sam always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. Seeing some on sale
one day, he buys them, wears them home, walking proudly. He walks into
their hotel room and says to his wife, "Notice anything different,
Bessie?"

Bessie looks him over, "Nope."

Sam says excitedly, "Come on, Bessie, take a good look. Notice anything
different about me?"

Bessie looks again, "Nope."

Frustrated, Sam storms off into the bathroom, undresses, and walks back
into the room completely naked except for his boots. Again, he asks, a
little louder this time,

"Notice anything DIFFERENT?"

Bessie looks up and says, "Sam, what's different? It's hanging down
today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again
tomorrow."

Furious, Sam! yells, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT'S HANGING DOWN, BESSIE?
IT'S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!"

To which Bessie replies, "Shoulda bought a hat, Sam........ Shoulda
bought a hat."

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cuban (Added On: 2010-03-10 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

What is the Cubans national anthem

Row row row youre boat

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Blondes (Punny) (Added On: 2010-03-10 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

A group of very attractive young female city employees discovered they could nicely supplement their income by moonlighting as call girls. One of the girls discovered she was more successful as a blonde after having her hair bleached. She convinced the others that the old saying, "Blondes have more fun," is true. The ladies became so popular that they were able to charge exorbitant rates.

They even charged their taxi fares to the Johns they served. When hard times hit and the market got soft, they needed a bigger come-on. Some of them understood the economic law of supply and demand, so decided to lower their rates. They decided not to include taxi fares in the fees they charged their customers.

They have become known as: The taxi-free municipal blondes.

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From the book "Ahaggy Dogs Have Punny Tales"

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Answer to spouse question (Added On: 2010-03-10 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

I heard this joke from my husband.

Q: Honey, would you still love me if I were burned beyond all recognition?

A: I'd love you MORE!

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There are 1054 funny General jokes in this category.

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