General jokes

There are 3082 funny General jokes in this category.

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Lawyer Joke (Added On: 2012-05-11 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

Carlson was charged with stealing a Mercedes Benz, and after a long trial, the jury acquitted him.

Later that day Carlson came back to the judge who had presided at the hearing.

"Your honor," he said, "I wanna get out a warrant for that dirty lawyer of mine."

"Why ?" asked the judge. "He won your acquittal. What do you want to have him arrested for?"

"Well, your honor," replied Carlson, "I didn't have the money to pay his fee, so he went and took the car I stole.

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Confusion (Added On: 2012-05-11 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

Whats the defintion of confusion?

20 blind lesbians at a fish market.

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Writing in space (Added On: 2012-05-10 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

During the heat of the space race in the 1960's, the U.S. National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) decided it needed a ball point pen to write in the zero gravity confines of its space capsules. After considerable research and development, the Astronaut Pen was developed at a cost of $1 million. The pen worked and also enjoyed some modest success as a novelty item back here on earth.

The Soviet Union, faced with the same problem, used a pencil.

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The Priest and the Rabbi. (Added On: 2012-05-10 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

A priest and a rabbi operated a church and a synagogue across the street from each other. Since their schedules intertwined, they decided to go in together to buy a car.

After the purchase, they drove it home and parked it on the street between them.

A few minutes later, the rabbi looked out and saw the priest sprinkling water on their new car. It didn`t need a wash, so he hurried out and asked the priest what he was doing. "I`m blessing it," the priest replied.

The rabbi considered this a moment, then went back inside the synagogue. He reappeared a moment later with a hacksaw, walked over to the back of the car and cut off two inches of the tailpipe.

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Curiosity (Added On: 2012-05-10 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

A guy’s walking past an asylum, and can hear all the inmates inside screaming at the top of their lungs, “Thirteen! Thirteen! Thirteen!!!”. He peeks through a hole in the fence to see what all the commotion is about, and a finger suddenly pops out and jabs him in the eye. He yells in pain, and the inmates all start gleefully shouting, “Fourteen! Fourteen! Fourteen!!!”.

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There are 3082 funny General jokes in this category.

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