Love and marriage jokes

There are 47 funny Love and marriage jokes in this category.

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A quote on marriage (Added On: 2010-05-18 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

Suicide is belated acquiescence in the opinion of one's wife's relatives.

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A quote on marriage (Added On: 2010-05-16 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

There was a man who said, "I never knew what happiness was until I got married...and then it was too late!"

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Sex Survey (Added On: 2010-05-08 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

The research worker, conducting a sex survey, phoned one of the husbands whose completed form was spread out before him."Mr Pullman, there seems to be some discrepancies between the answers of you and your wife to the same question. For example, under 'Frequency of Intercourse you wrote 'Three times a week and your wife 'Three times a night." "Well, that's right," replied the husband, "but that's only until we have paid off the mortgage on the house."

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New husband (Added On: 2010-04-18 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

A lady was married to this brute of a man who always beat and kicked her. On top of all that, when they did have sex, it was no good. So, she decided she was tired of him and got a divorce.A couple days after the divorce finalized she placed an ad in the paper that read: "WANTED. Husband that won't beat me or kick me. "Good sex a must." A week or so passed and she finally gets a knock at the door. She goes to answer it only to find a man sitting in a wheel chair. She asks what he wants and he informs her that he will be her new husband. "Well, you don't have any arms." she notices. "I can't beat you then, can I?" he replies. "And you don't have any legs!" "SO! That only means I can't kick you." She pauses for a moment and then asks, "Well what about the sex?" He answers confidently,"How do you think I knocked on the door."

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Grandma Comes To Visit (Added On: 2010-04-17 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke)

The little boy greeted his grandmother with a hug and said, "I'm so happy to see you grandma. Now maybe daddy will do the trick he has been promising us."

The grandmother was curious. "What trick is that my dear?" she asked.

The little boy replied, "I heard daddy tell mommy that he would climb the walls if you came to visit us again."

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There are 47 funny Love and marriage jokes in this category.

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