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Pun Fun jokes
Helping out the knight (Added On: 2010-04-05 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke) Sir Edgbert, knight of the realm, was hurrying home on a cold, dark, wet night when, suddenly, his horse suffered a major coronary and died on the spot. All Sir Edgbert could do was collect up what belongings he could and tramp onwards.After staggering for a spell, he decides that he must get alternative transport. Accordingly, he heads for the nearest building which, as luck would have it, is a small farm. He strides up to the door, bangs on it and shouts 'A horse! A horse!. I must have a horse!".The door opens to reveal a young girl. She looks at Sir Edgbert and says, "Your pardon, good night but my father and brothers are returning from the village on the other side of the forest and will not be back before noon tomorrow. They are riding all our horses".Sir Edgbert is saddened by this and says "But I must return home immediately. Have you any idea where I may accuire alternative transportation?".The young girl says "I know of no other horses hereabouts, but sometimes my brothers ride our Great Dane dog when the need arises. Would use of that help?"Sir Edgbert is desperate and says "If I must, I must. Show me the animal". The young girl leads the way around to the back of the farmhouse to a stable. She dissapears inside and returns leading and enormous dogs which is quite of a size for riding. Unfortunately, the dog has seen better days. It's coat is threadbare, it's legs are spindly and it seems to be breathing labouriously.Sir Edgbert looks at the young girl and says, "Surely, you wouldn't send a knight out on a dog like this?" Visiting the lawyer (Added On: 2010-01-28 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke) A guy from Czechslovakia was visiting his cousin the lawyer in California, and they went for a hike in Yellowstone Park.While they were hiking they were attacked by 2 bears, one male and one female. The male bear dismembered and ate the Czechslovakian guy, but the lawyer managed to escape.He ran straight to the nearest Rangers station, and told them what had happened, and they sent out a group of rangers to see what was going on.Sure enough, the Rangers arrived at the place that the lawyer mentioned, and there were the female and the male bears. So one of the Rangers took his rifle and shot the female.So the other Rangers asked "why did you shoot the female? he said that the male ate his friend" So the Ranger answers "Would you believe a lawyer if he told you that the Czech is in the male?" The new French cook (Added On: 2009-07-16 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke) The French will eat almost anything. A young cook decided that the French would enjoy feasting on rabbits and decided to raise rabbits in Paris and sell them to the finer restaurants in the city. He searched all over Paris seeking a suitable place to raise his rabbits. None could be found. Finally, an old priest at the cathedral said he could have a small area behind the rectory for his rabbits. He successfully raised a number of them, and when he went about Paris selling them, a restaurant owner asked him where he got such fresh rabbits. The young man replied, "I raise them myself, near the cathedral. In fact, I have ... a hutch back of Notre Dame. Doctor goes to a bar (Added On: 2009-04-13 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke) A doctor made it his regular habit to stop off at a bar for a hazelnut daiquiri on his way home. The bartender knew of his habit, and would always have the drink waiting at precisely 5:03 p.m.One afternoon, as the end of the work day approached, the bartender was dismayed to find that he was out of hazelnut extract. Thinking quickly, he threw together a daiquiri made with hickory nuts and set it on the bar.The doctor came in at his regular time, took one sip of the drink and exclaimed, "This isn't a hazelnut daiquiri!""No, I'm sorry", replied the bartender, "it's a hickory daiquiri, doc." Mary Poppins visiting (Added On: 2009-02-23 Rating : N/R / 5.00 Rate This Joke) Mary Poppins was traveling home, but due to worsening weather, she decided to stop at a hotel for the night. She approached the receptionist and asked for a room for the night. "Certainly madam", he replied courteously. "Is the restaurant open still?" inquired Mary. "Sorry, no," came the reply, "but room service is available all night. Would you care to select something from this menu?" Mary smiled and took the menu and perused it. "Hmm, I would like cauliflower cheese please," said Mary. "Certainly madam," he replied. "And can I have breakfast in bed?" asked Mary politely. The receptionist nodded and smiled. "In that case, I would love a couple of poached eggs please," Mary mused. After confirming the order, Mary signed in and went up to her room for the night. The night passed uneventfully and next morning Mary came down early to check out. The same guy was still on the desk. "Morning madam...sleep well?" "Yes, thank you," Mary replied. "Food to your liking?" "Well, I have to say the cauliflower cheese was exceptional, I don't think I have had better. Shame about the eggs tho....they really weren't that nice at all," replied Mary truthfully. "Oh...well, perhaps you could contribute these thoughts to our Guest Comments Book.We are always looking to improve our service and would value your opinion," said the receptionist. "OK, I will...thanks!" replied Mary....who checked out, then scribbled a comment into the book. Waving, she left to continue her journey. Curious, the receptionist picked up the book to see the comment Mary had written. "Supercauliflowercheesebuteggswerequiteatrocious!"
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